“A police investigation in to the sexual assault and death of several sheep is hampered because the suspect has a twin brother. DNA found at the scene of the sick assaults in and around Tongs Farm, Botany Bay Lane, Chislehurst, could belong to either of the 27-year-old men. The molester left his clothes strewn across the fields from which police were able to extract DNA but if the twins are identical it will be the same. Two sheep are thought to have been killed and several others traumatised in the brutal attacks which happened between March and June this year. At first, only one man was arrested during a dawn raid at a property in Dulwich on July 17. He was arrested on suspicion of bestiality and possession of drugs with intent to supply. But the Times has discovered that a second man was arrested on suspicion of bestiality at his home in Sydenham on July 18. Both men, who have been bailed, are forbidden from entering farmyards and the borough of Bromley. According to a source, a key witness now has to pick out the suspect in an identity parade because although they are twins, ‘there are differences between them’. A police spokesperson would not confirm the men were twins or whether there would be an identity parade but said: ‘We can confirm that there have been two arrests and enquires are continuing.” — Bromley Times (UK)

(Thanks to Furpo for the link.)

Ever see the David Cronenberg film Dead Ringers? It is based partly on the true story of identical twin brothers who became doctors — gynecologists, of all things — and proceeded to live about as decadent a life as they could. Eventually they died from barbiturate withdrawal. You hear about drug fiends dying from overdoses often enough, but from withdrawal? You can imagine how deeply addicted they must have been.

These twin gynecologists may now be outdone on the degeneracy meter by the “sheep abuse” suspects. The article speaks as though there is only one bestialist, and thus the problem is to determine which brother shtupped the sheep. But what if the assaults were committed by both brothers? Or why not one brother one night and the other brother the next? Then again, whether it was one or both, the story raises intriguing philosophical questions. Suppose only one of them rapes sheep. Could scientists do genetic profiles of the two brothers and perhaps isolate some gene that inclines a person toward sex with animals? If a zoophilic gene were discovered, would parents want to screen their children for it at birth? What would you do if you had a zoophilic baby? Euthanize it? Keep it away from the pet goldfish?

The whole story also possesses wonderful dramatic possibilities. Imagine each brother accusing the other of sheep fuckery. You’d never be able to figure out which was telling the truth. What could you do — keep them locked in a sheep barn until one gives in to the temptation to screw some woolly hole? Or what about the supposed ESP of twins? If one brother fucks animals and the other doesn’t, would the “normal” twin have to suffer through a vicarious, paranormal experience of an act that repulses him? The camera shows Twin B lying in bed, half asleep. Suddenly he is roused by the intensely realistic visions of sheep sex beamed to him from his brother… What a story. Somebody get David Cronenberg on the line.

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