“A man allegedly exposed himself and masturbated in front of two drive-thru window employees at the McDonald’s located at 7600 Little River Turnpike. The suspect entered the drive-thru line on Thursday, June 26 shortly before 5 a.m. He placed his order, drove forward and stopped to pay and pick up his food. The 23 and 31-year-old Annandale women, working in the restaurant saw what the suspect was doing and immediately notified their manager who went to the window to chase off the suspect. The subsequent investigation led officers to the home of Thomas Matthew Brady, 20… Positive identification was made and warrants were obtained. On Saturday, June 28, Brady was transported to the Fairfax County Adult Detention Center and charged with two counts of indecent exposure and one count of indecent gestures.”   — Alex Times (US)

Here is a picture of the wanker. He looks like the kind of guy with whom you might play a game of pick-up basketball in the park — but clearly he was less interested in picking up than in pulling off. News reports fail to say whether he made any witty comments about manufacturing his own special sauce.

You can’t help but wonder why exhibitionists choose to reveal themselves in the places that they do. If a guy pulls down his pants in front of a kindergarten, you automatically assume that he’s a pedophile. But you can’t really make the same inference about a person who exposes himself at a McDonald’s drive-thru. He probably doesn’t have a sexual fetish for McNuggets or for women in polyester uniforms. So why that? Why there? It’s difficult to imagine, especially when there is the obvious risk of revealing your face, the make and model of your car, and your license plate number. Furthermore, given the recent spike in gasoline prices, it’s not cheap to drive around exposing yourself. (What do green exhibitionists do — expose themselves from bicycles?) Maybe it was precisely Mr. Brady’s perversity not just to expose himself, but to expose himself in a costly way.

If you put Mr. Brady together with the woman recently arrested for trading sex for gasoline, you might even make the case that perverts react to social crises too. Usually people think of perversion as a warped expression of individualism, and yet perverts live in the world the same as anyone else. Are there people whose sexual pathologies are influenced by gas prices? Economic trends? Crashes and booms?

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