Appendix Removed Through Vagina
“On March 26, 2008, surgeons at UC San Diego Medical Center removed an inflamed appendix through a patient’s vagina, a first in the United States. Following the 50-minute procedure, the patient, Diana Schlamadinger, reported only minor discomfort. Removal of diseased organs through the body’s natural openings offers patients a rapid recovery, minimal pain, and no scarring. Key to these surgical clinical trials is collaboration with medical device companies to develop new minimally-invasive tools. The procedure, called Natural Orifice Translumenal Endoscopic Surgery (NOTES), involves passing surgical instruments through a natural orifice, such as the mouth or vagina, to remove a diseased organ such as an appendix or gallbladder. Only one incision is made through the belly button for the purpose of inserting a two millimeter camera into the abdominal cavity so the surgeons can safely access the surgical site… Schlamadinger, a third-year graduate student at UC San Diego working toward her Ph.D. in chemistry, reported her pain as a ‘1′ or a ‘0.5′ on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being the lowest. The opportunity to participate in the clinical trial was attractive to the scientist in her.” — Science Daily (US)
You can view several pictures from the operation at UCSD’s web site. No, you can’t see Ms. Schlamadinger’s vag. Of course, she should be commended for her bravery not only in undergoing the procedure but in being so open about it. Medically, it’s a wonderful development. Surgeons are finally learning that the human body is not a cadaver such as the ones they dissect in school. It’s a living thing, and it recuperates much better if you don’t create new wounds to remove or repair malfunctioning organs.
That being said, it’s hard not to deny that there is something about this surgery that speaks to the homunculus in the pervert’s brain. When a genital enters into a procedure, it sexualizes the operation somehow. The appendix gets tied to the vagina, and vice versa. Random permutations float through your brain. You imagine somebody masturbating an appendix. You wonder how the procedure would work for men. (Maybe in the future there will be an appendix-killing pill sort of like the abortion pill. Then a guy could just piss out his malignant organ.) You ask yourself what would happen if the patient is a virgin. Would the surgeons break her hymen to extract the appendix? How would she feel about that? And while the NOTES procedure serves to minimize pain, its proximity to the clitoris makes you wonder if it could possibly serve to introduce pleasure into the surgery. Could a woman climax from having an organ pulled out her vagina? “Doctor,” she might moan, “not so fast. Shove it back in a second. Right. Now pull it back out again. And in again. And out. And oooohhh….”
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