“A Winnipeg man caught with his hands full while surfing for porn on a university computer wasn’t going to be discouraged before getting the job done, a court heard yesterday. The 26-year-old pleaded guilty to one count of committing an indecent act and three breaches of probation after security staff at the University of Manitoba’s McDermot Avenue campus library caught him downloading porn from a public computer and masturbating on Aug. 4. Court was told the man made no move to buckle up when approached by security staff and said ‘I’m almost done, can I finish?’ The man — who was living on the street at the time of the offence and suffers from mental health problems — later told police he took matters into his own hands ‘all the time’ at the library. In court, the man took issue with Judge Tim Preston calling his actions ‘public.’ ‘I wasn’t masturbating in public,’ he said. ‘I was just sitting at a computer, downloading a few things and I got a little horny… I do it all the time.’ Preston sentenced the man to time served and six months probation, sparking an argument from the man, who said he would rather stay in jail than serve more probation. He threatened he would re-offend if released. ‘I’m not in the business of keeping people in jail longer than they need to be,’ said Preston. ‘You’re 26, you’ve got a long life ahead of you. I’m just saying you should keep the peace and be of good behaviour. That means not masturbating in a library or anywhere else. Got it?’” — Winnipeg Sun (Canada)

(Thanks to Furpo for the link.)

It used to be that young men typically viewed libraries as dour, boring places full of dusty books that nobody wanted to read. Libraries were for bookworms and geeks, not for healthy young men looking for action and adventure. However, little did these macho men know that, even before the internet, there were all sorts of sexual stimulation to be found in the library. You just had to know where to look — and the bookworms and geeks knew where: ethnographic publications with boob shots of tribal women; Marilyn Monroe biographies with reproductions of her Playboy spread; scientific periodicals with close-ups of genitalia. Often these latter were diseased, but it was more stimulating to see a herpetic vagina than no vagina at all.

Nowadays all that is changing. You don’t need to be an expert in obscure ethnographic publications in order to excavate the eros in the bookstacks. Nowadays libraries offer free internet connections to their communities, and the internet offers — well, you know what’s out there. Crazy shit, right? So it should come as no surprise that the library is slowly being reinvented. No longer is it the refuge of the four-eyed nerd. Now it is the haven of a new clientele that includes the shameless Winnipeg wanker, the Arizona college student, the pedophile, and probably a dozen other types of perv. Looking for a wild time? No longer do you have to hit the bars, the strip joints, the swinger clubs, the adult shops. Now you can go straight to what may be the epicenter of depravity in most towns: the local library.

VideoBox

It's like the iTunes Music Store for Porn. Download unlimited high-quality video for only $9.95/month.