Breaking, Entering, and Wanking
“A Littleton man accused of breaking into homes to masturbate was bound over for trial Tuesday on unusual charges — two felony counts of burglary with intent to litter. Robert Kent Peterson, 45, waived his right to a preliminary hearing and agreed to undergo a psychological evaluation. Free on $50,000 bail, he is due back in court June 5. Peterson, who works for Lockheed Martin, was convicted of similar charges in 1999. He told his probation officer that he had broken into homes at least 40 times and masturbated at half of them, according to court records. He also admitted to stealing his niece’s panties. In both of the new cases, Peterson is accused of breaking into the homes of single mothers with teenage daughters in Littleton… Prosecutors said that her 15-year-old daughter came home from school to find a man in their bathroom, and that he identified himself as working for a plumbing company. The girl fled from the house, and the man left. In the second case, prosecutors said, a woman found a man hiding in her daughter’s closet about 3 p.m. Feb. 3, and he claimed to be there to check the plumbing. The underwear drawer of the girl’s dresser was open and in disarray. When the woman confronted the man, he told her that he must have the wrong house and left.” — Rocky Mountain News (US)
It’s tough to say whether breaking into somebody else’s house to jerk off is a prelude to breaking into somebody else’s house in order to commit rape. Rapes committed in homes may require forced entry, but odds are that rapes committed in homes are usually perpetrated by “loved ones” — family members, male “friends,” and the like — who didn’t need to break in. Moreover, it’s conceivable that breaking, entering, and wanking was a thrill in itself. A person who likes to play at being sadistic doesn’t seriously injure or kill his playmates. Maybe a guy who breaks in and gets off doesn’t want to go any further either.
That being said, it’s hard to decide who is more ridiculous in this story: the perp or the police. The perp tried to excuse himself with those pathetic “checking the plumbing” excuses. Hopefully he was being ironic, aware of the obvious analogies between plumbing and certain body parts. If he wasn’t being ironic, then that’s a seriously lame-ass excuse. But perhaps you can’t blame him, since the legal authorities charged him with “intent to litter.” Imagine that! The guy was going to leave a little man-goo in his victim’s bathroom, and the police are calling it litter. Were they being ironic too? After all, litter can also mean brood, as in a litter of kitties, and to make a brood you have to spill a bit of goo…
AAH a phantom masturbator! Happens all the time, you know. Usually they don’t go breaking into peoples houses though…that’s a crime.
Telephone booths, doorways, theaters, restaurants, at the beach, and yes libraries, those are typical places, but somebody’s private domain is a real ego (as in power trip) to pull off (pun intended).
Phantom masturbators a part of the phantom force like phantom shitters and phantom pissers, they are harmless but a pest.
Well thats just….. pleasent….
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