“A Mr Kang who went to a private hospital to have foreskin resection has lost more than he expected, the Xinmin Evening News reported Friday. Kang, a middle-aged man, read an advertisement and went to a private hospital in Jinshan District on September 8. He followed doctor’s instruction to take a course of microwave ‘heliotherapy’. After one hour, Kang noticed that his penis had been burned black and was painful. He had difficulty passing water but the doctor had gone off work and he could find nobody to help him. On the following day, the doctor tried to treat the inflammation and advised Kang to try other hospitals. Urologists found that Kang’s penis had been so severely ‘cooked’ that the burned parts had to be excised reducing the size of the penis. The president of the private hospital admitted an ‘accident’ had occurred but asserted that the ‘operation’ had been performed according to the instructions set out on the ‘heliotherapy’ manual and it was the first time that such an accident had occurred, Xinmin said.” —Shanghai Daily (China)

It can be very intimidating to enter a hospital or to undergo a surgical procedure. Doctors speak a language that describes your most intimate physical struggles with an abstraction incomprehensible to the layman. Alien machines probe and peer into your innards. Complete strangers poke you and prod you and prescribe the ingestion of drugs that alter body and mind. It’s a disorienting experience, and so you can’t necessarily make fun of a guy who finds himself subjecting his penis to a treatment that turns out to be the equivalent of microwave cookery. The guy himself was just trusting his doctors, the same as you would do if you were in his position.

Originally the guy went to the hospital for a “foreskin resection,” meaning either that he was having his foreskin removed or perhaps pared owing to some infection. It’s unclear from the article whether the resection was performed and then followed by the course of “microwave heliotherapy” or whether the “microwave heliotherapy” was itself meant to cure the man’s diseased foreskin. In either case, the real question here concerns the validity of “microwave heliotherapy.” What the hell is that? Heliotherapy — or sun therapy — has been shown to have some modest efficacy with skin ailments such as psoriasis. It’s not inconceivable that a doctor might have recommended some exposure to the sun as a way of making the man’s penis feel better.

What’s difficult to understand is how this “heliotherapy” could have involved microwave radiation. If you google the phrase “microwave radiation,” the only results — like this — are in Chinese. And if you look at the electromagnetic spectrum, it’s difficult to see how microwaves — which are lower than visible and infrared light — could form a significant enough portion of sunlight to have any curative effect. PervScan is neither a physicist nor a physician, but frankly “microwave heliotherapy” sounds bogus. After all, it cooked a man’s penis. Was that an accident of overexposure or a danger inherent to the “cure” itself?

More qualified minds will want to weigh in on that question, and perhaps more deviant ones — like those who take pleasure in eating a cooked penis — might even want to look into this technique for their own twisted purposes.

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