“Two authors say they’ve found a terrific sex manual they want to share with 1,000 other women at a conference next weekend in the Chicago area. It’s called the Bible. ‘We’re privileged that we are able to express to couples that God wants them to delight and revel in that area, to enjoy it as a gift,’ said Linda Dillow, co-author of three books on the subject with Lorraine Pintus… Dillow says many churches have had unbiblical and prudish ideas about marital sex for centuries. ‘Martin Luther said intercourse was never without sin,’ she noted… Pintus said their message, based on the Song of Solomon, is needed in an age where people feel caught between the just-say-no mantra touted in religious circles and the anything-goes hookup culture seen in TV and movies. ‘When all you teach kids is ‘just say no,’ they don’t know how to say yes when they get married,’ she added. The Song of Solomon, she said, is unabashed about making love outdoors and dancing provocatively for your spouse, and it even has veiled references that hint at oral sex.” —Chicago Tribune (US)

As a way of celebrating the election of a new pope, PervScan thought it would be a good idea to remind Catholics — and Christians around the world — that you don’t have to be frigid to be religious. Saint Peter is not saltpeter. Too often the church has placed the emphasis in “good sex” on the good and not on the sex. Free yourselves from that antiquated notion!

That’s the message of the books and seminars by Ms. Pintus and Ms. Dillow. The Bible itself, they claim, is a sex manual. It has never been a secret that the Song of Solomon is a work of tremendous sensuality, but these co-authors seek to package that sensuality for the sexually frustrated readers of the self-help-manual age. If the Song of Solomon says do it in the great outdoors, well then, by God, do it in the great outdoors! If the Song of Solomon implies you can give and receive good head, well then, by God, give and get good head! Spice up your sex life, they argue, by adding the Imitation of Solomon to the Imitation of Christ. Why not?

Presumably, however, Ms. Pintus and Ms. Dillow stop short of endorsing some of the murkier parts of Biblical sexuality. Just because Lot slept with his daughters doesn’t mean you should feel free to indulge in incest. And just because Jesus washed the feet of his disciples doesn’t mean you should feel free to do it, well, for the wrong reasons. Besides which, if you approach a girl in a shopping mall and try to wash her feet for her, odds are she’s just not going to believe you if you claim to be doing it out of humility.

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