“With new techniques in hand, scientists have carried out an abundance of rigorous, serious studies on the nuances of the penis. Research has found, for example, that shoe length has nothing to do with penis size. Gay men will no doubt be pleased to hear that they have larger penises on average, according to some research. One study even looked at correlations between penis size and political preferences. Numerous studies have asserted that ethnicity, in accordance with certain popular beliefs, is correlated with penis size. Researchers claim that people of African descent have, on average, the largest penises, Caucasians come next, and Asians have the smallest ones. One researcher, University of Western Ontario’s Dr. J. Philippe Rushton, who has been termed a racist by many, has taken this trend a step further. He says having a small penis might not be so bad, because his research says that intelligence is inversely correlated with penis size; in other words, the smarter you are, the smaller your penis (which, of course, merits suspicion as to his intellectual motives). Rushton says this relates to the fact that Asians are statistically ‘more intelligent’ than whites, and blacks ‘less intelligent’ than whites — more penis, less brain…” —The Varsity Online (Canada)

(Thanks to alanr for the link.)

This article provides a good overview of current (serious) research on penis size. It concludes that, ironically, men think size is more important than women do — which is strange since, if women prefer motion to meat, you would think that men wouldn’t care so much about the heft of their tool. It makes you wonder: do men care about the size of their penis not because they want to please their women but because they want to impress other men? Is it a competitive moreso than a reproductive instinct?

No doubt the most fascinating cock stat to emerge from current research is the controversial thesis by Dr. Rushton that penis size and brain power are inversely related. You’ve all heard the phrase “more balls than brain” — apparently it may really be a biological axiom. Guys with big dicks tend to be dumber than guys with little ones — which, in a certain respect, makes perfect sense. Survival of the fittest is the rule of the land, so if you’re deficient in one area you make up for it another. If you can’t wow ‘em with your wand, you amaze ‘em with your mind.

When you put it that way — i.e. in popular form — it’s hard to imagine anyone objecting to the correlation. However, the moment you add race to the mix, it’s a potent brew. Black guys have big dicks; guys with big dicks tend to have small brains; therefore black guys are dumb. The logic is impeccable, but the conclusion is unpalatable. You could spin it other ways. Philosophers are smart; smart guys tend to have small penises; therefore philosophers have small dicks. No wonder there’s that myth about Heraclitus that he went around crying all the time.

At any rate, all hope is not lost. Guys with less brain and more penis can always revert to thinking with their dicks. And guys with small penises and big brains can pride themselves on their ability to give a good mindfuck.

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