“An elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken’s neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it, the state Rompres news agency said on Monday. It said 67 year-old Constantin Mocanu, from a village near the southeastern town of Galati, rushed out into his yard in his underwear to kill a noisy chicken keeping him awake at night. ‘I confused it with the chicken’s neck,’ Mocanu, who was admitted to the emergency hospital in Galati, was quoted as saying. ‘I cut it… and the dog rushed and ate it.’” —Independent Online (New Zealand)

(Thanks to alanr for the link.)

Sometimes people talk about the horrors of getting older. Your hair goes gray. You get wrinkles around your eyes. You get arthritis, cataracts, clogged arteries. Women have to suffer through menopause and men have to get annual checkups for prostate cancer. It’s no fun getting old — least of all when you have those “senior moments” that occur when you’re chasing a chicken in the middle of the night. How any man not suffering from Alzheimer’s could mistake his penis for the neck of a chicken is certainly a mystery. After all, when you grab a chicken by the neck, it squawks. When you grab your penis, not only does it not squawk, it gives you a little tingle in the pleasure center. You have to be pretty blind with rage for that feeling not to register.

About the only bright side to this story for the guy is that maybe this terrible accident will help with one of those other problems of old age. Maybe it will help him pee…

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