Man Accused of Sex with Chicken
“A Sabine Parish man is accused of fowl play, authorities said. Timothy Garner, 35, of the Florien area is suspected of having sex with a chicken. Garner was arrested Thursday after being caught in the chicken house, Florien police Chief Herman R. Love said. Earlier this week, a West Monroe man was arrested accused of having sex with a pig. Ouachita Parish Sheriff’s deputies arrested Austin Gullette, 45, after his sister says she caught him with one of her three pigs. On Thursday, the chickens’ owner heard the animals making a commotion and saw headlights outside. A neighbor also heard the commotion and found Garner inside the chicken house, Love said… After being brought in for questioning at the Sabine Parish Sheriff’s Office, Love said Garner admitted to having sex with the animal.” —The Town Talk (US)
Usually you think of bestiality as being an opportunistic perversion — a farmer spends so much time with his animals that it’s not so inconceivable he should consider stupping them. Or the same goes for certain ladies with their poodles — when she sees those long canine tongues day in and day out, it’s not so surprising that she should think of putting them to a pleasurable use.
And yet, because bestiality tends to be an opportunistic perversion, it’s strange when somebody like this perp goes to such lengths to satisfy himself. It’s one thing to be in the chicken house every day and find yourself subject to a twisted impulse that makes you lower your pants. It’s another thing to drive over to somebody else’s chicken house and rape the hens. It suggests a less opportunistic and more deliberate bestiality — a real fetish, as opposed to just a lapse of judgement.
But a llama is numero uno,
as the limerick goes
Might be for some people. But the big saying is, “Dogs are Man’s Best Friend” My Best Friend and lovers are in bed with me every night. And so much love it, they are willing to go to bed with me every night for it. Though we don’t do it everynight, unless they really bug me that I can’t get to sleep then we do it ….. I’ve only ever done dogs, and that’s all I’m ever going to do is dogs.
Who cares if he had sex with a chicken, i’d do.
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