“Two men accused of engaging in sexual activity in a men’s room at the West Manchester Mall told police that men regularly go to that public restroom looking for action… From March to August, township police arrested 14 men during a sting operation at the mall’s men’s room… In March, Reeling masturbated while standing in front of a stall where a police officer could see him… In July, Bubb masturbated in front of an undercover officer while standing next to the paper towel dispenser… In June, Lehr touched the leg of an officer four times, police said. He then looked at the officer through a peephole, before standing up in front of the opening… Police accused Goodman of reaching under a bathroom stall wall to rub the leg of a police officer in March. Goodman moved his hand on the thigh toward the officer’s genitals…” —Evening Sun (US)

This is really an astonishing story when you take a close look at the details. For example, here are the ages of the men arrested so far during the sting: 45, 72, 65, 56, 66, 65, 20, 73, 43, 54, 42, 51, 58, 19. That’s a mean age of about 52 years old. What’s more, the number is brought down by the seemingly anomalous presence of two men twenty or under. If you remove them, you end up with a median age of about 58. Clearly this was the gay trolling equivalent of the Kiwanis Club, a place where retirees and guys saving for retirement could jerk off staring at each other’s hairy ankles.

And that raises another question: just how do cops go about performing a sting in such circumstances? From the arrest reports, it’s obvious that the undercover agents must have been simulating an attempt at using the bathroom for its normal purposes. In other words, they clearly had their pants down. In fact, they couldn’t have conducted a sting without showing some bare leg, since the presence of clothed legs in a bathroom stall would immediately raise some alarms.

So how do the undercover cops go about a sting like this? Do they wear gym shorts and sit on the toilet for an hour or two? Or do they just go in and pull their pants down? And then what? When somebody flashes a penis, do they leap out with their pants around the ankles? And what do they say? “Stop! In the name of the law! Step back from the stall and take your hands off your penis!” Is this considered a fun job or — so to speak — a real shit detail? And how do they do it without laughing?

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