“A skinny rapist met his match in an angry, 275-pound prostitute, police said. Adrian Castillo Ramirez, 140 pounds, allegedly tried to sexually assault a 24-year-old Bakersfield prostitute who was nearly twice his weight. But she took his knife, stripped him naked and paraded him in front of other prostitutes, after asking how many of them had ever been forced into sex at knifepoint. Then she tried to take him — still naked — to the police station, reports said.” — San Francisco Chronicle (US)

You know what they say: “The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin’.” A lot of guys like plus-size women, which is a good thing especially now that the so-called “obesity epidemic” has swept across America. There are web sites with chunky chicks, pornographic porkers, and fatties fellating the fellows who fetishize their folds of flesh.

But if you’re going to rape somebody, you still have to use a little common sense. For instance, skinny little runts should not try to take on ladies the size of a sumo wrestler without a much more serious weapon than a knife. After all, what good is a knife when it can’t even penetrate far enough through your victim’s belly to puncture a vital organ? You need at least a harpoon, like they use for spearing whales, or better yet a gun, if you want to molest a mountain of human meat.

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