“Extreme sports enthusiasts in Russia have been racing down rapids on inflatable dolls.The race was staged on rapids in the Vuoksa River, near St Petersburg, which are usually used for canoe or catamaran rafting… Pravda reports the participants praised the dolls for ‘floating wonderfully,’ being ‘nice to the touch’ and for ‘not wanting to get married.’” — Ananova (UK)

This is a pretty great idea, and you can imagine that using love dolls instead of inflatable rafts would attract a lot more people to the sport. No doubt you could even go further and transform any of your favorite sports into a new kind of lewd game. For example, you could play Sex Toy Baseball using a ben wa ball as a baseball, a pocket pussy as a mit, and a dildo as a bat. Or you could even get rid of the pocket pussy and the dildo so that, when you play defense, you have to catch the ball with an orifice, and when you come up to bat, you have to hit with your penis. (Women, of course, could be allowed to bat with a strap-on.)

Then again, turnabout is fair play, and so if sex toys are going to be introduced into sports, then athletic equipment ought also to be introduced into sex. When you’re done playing Sex Toy Baseball, you can celebrate with nine innings of strenuous intercourse. You can rub yourself on a catcher’s mit or push a big-league bat into your orifice of choice. You can do a striptease in the bullpen and streak naked around the bases. You can become the dominatrix of the batting cage and take a whip to anyone who strikes out. You can lead your team to the World Series of Fornication and bring home the golden trophy of orgasm.

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