“A Brazilian man who went to a clinic to have an aching ear checked ended up having a vasectomy after mistakenly believing that the doctor had called his name… ‘He was called by the full name and yet thought it was him. But the strangest thing is that he asked no questions when the doctor started preparations in the area which had so little to do with his ear,’ Vanessa Guimaraes said. ‘He later explained that he thought it was an ear inflammation that got down to his testicles,’ she added.” — CNN (US)

At first sight, it may seem incredibly stupid for a man to submit to a vasectomy when it’s his ears that are troubling him. And yet, once you think about it, you can see where this guy was coming from. What man hasn’t felt, after a period of sexual abstinence, as though the semen is backing up in him like a clogged drain? When you reach that point, you half expect to wake up one morning with semen leaking out your nose or your ears. If you weren’t schooled in anatomy, it’s almost a natural connection to make: you can imagine a single system of tubes inside you, like the plumbing in a house, that carries various fluids to their destinations. A clog in one part of the plumbing can cause an outburst in another. If you don’t ejaculate often enough, semen leaks out your ears. If you have an inflammation in your ears, you drain it through an incision in your scrotum. You can get ear wax in your cock, sperm in your nose, snot in your ears — and if you cry about it, you’ll weep tears of piss.

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