Man Gets Vasectomy for Earache
“A Brazilian man who went to a clinic to have an aching ear checked ended up having a vasectomy after mistakenly believing that the doctor had called his name… ‘He was called by the full name and yet thought it was him. But the strangest thing is that he asked no questions when the doctor started preparations in the area which had so little to do with his ear,’ Vanessa Guimaraes said. ‘He later explained that he thought it was an ear inflammation that got down to his testicles,’ she added.” — CNN (US)
At first sight, it may seem incredibly stupid for a man to submit to a vasectomy when it’s his ears that are troubling him. And yet, once you think about it, you can see where this guy was coming from. What man hasn’t felt, after a period of sexual abstinence, as though the semen is backing up in him like a clogged drain? When you reach that point, you half expect to wake up one morning with semen leaking out your nose or your ears. If you weren’t schooled in anatomy, it’s almost a natural connection to make: you can imagine a single system of tubes inside you, like the plumbing in a house, that carries various fluids to their destinations. A clog in one part of the plumbing can cause an outburst in another. If you don’t ejaculate often enough, semen leaks out your ears. If you have an inflammation in your ears, you drain it through an incision in your scrotum. You can get ear wax in your cock, sperm in your nose, snot in your ears — and if you cry about it, you’ll weep tears of piss.
no, no… i think he’s just really stupid. wandering up to the doc when someone else’s name was called (what about the dude expecting to end his fertile days, why didn’t he come running and save retard?), that shows a lack of brain power. of course, maybe doctors could help prevent this by just asking what would seem like stupid questions, like “so, here for a vasectomy today, eh?” if you’re the right guy, you tell him yes and roll your eyes… but if you’re the wrong guy, you might have to resist hugging him, realizing how close you came to losing your little guys.
I’ve done stupid things before but nothing that compares to this.
At least he won’t be producing any more children to pass his stupidity genes to.
Here’s a possible scenario:
The real vasectomy patient and the subject of the story got to talking. One about the reasons why he wants to stop having kids, the other about all the things that may be wrong with his ears, his family, his life…and the Vasectomy guy, hearing hi own name called, turns to the first man and says, “Dude, I think you need this vasectomy more than I do….”
Stupidity isn’t hereditary…
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