“A Malaysian man sliced off his own penis, then fried and ate it after taking hallucinatory pills that caused him to hear voices urging him to mutilate himself, police said today. The 34-year-old man claimed he only realised what he had done when he saw blood oozing from his crotch, said a police spokesman in the town of Sitiawan, 300km north of Kuala Lumpur.” — News.com.au (Australia)

This is a great story for parents to share with their children, since it makes a much more compelling anti-drug statement than some lame celebrity intoning, “Just Say No.” Who would have the nerve to swallow a hallucinogen if he thought it might cause him to eat his own penis (or, for you ladies, munch her own snatch)? It’s one thing to do the masturbatory position known as the “snake eating its own tail.” It’s one thing to blow yourself, but to chop off your most prized possession — and then fry it? Good God! What kind of hallucinogen leaves you high enough to be blissfully unaware of a genital amputation but lucid enough to grease up a pan and cook up a wiener?

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