“An electric shaver especially designed for shaving pubic hair into different shapes has gone on sale in Britain. Remington hope the Bikini Trim and Shape will prove a hit with the growing number of women who want to be a little more creative. A survey of 500 women commissioned by the company found 36% had trimmed their hair into a specific design. The most popular shape was a heart but others choose the first letter of their partner’s name… Of the 79% of women in the survey who said they trimmed their pubic hair, 27% have had a Brazilian Wax — noted for leaving a “racing strip” of hair down the centre of the bikini area. Other treatments mentioned included The Tiffany — where hair is trimmed into the shape of a small box; The Beckham — a Mohican tuft down the middle; and The Hollywood — a complete shave.” — Ananova (UK)

Given the immense popularity of body modification, tattoos, piercing, and so on, pubic hair will no doubt become the Next Big Thing, the medium of choice for the body-art vanguard. Using tools and instruments like this new Remington shaver, people will become veritable painters of pubes, creating noble works of art out of little black hairs. You can already imagine the bold new creations they’ll render in their fuzzy little crotch carpets. They’ll have names like the Trompe l’Oeil, which makes the vagina look like a penis, and the Kitsch, in which the pubes are dyed pink and shaved into the shape of a crucifix. Some designs will be named after famous artists: the Mona Lisa will give the pubes a mysterious little smile, the Caspar David Friedrich will shape the pubes into an isolated figure staring off into the vaginal horizon, and the Rothko will transform the vagina into a chapel. Other designs will be named after art movements of the past: the Cubist will put the breasts on top of the vagina, the Expressionist will transform the pubic hair into an expression of suffering and angst (certainly this will prove popular with Goth girls), and the Minimalist will turn the vagina into a square box.

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