“In an unusual act of patriotism, a Nevada brothel is offering free sex to troops returning from the U.S.-Iraq war… ‘We want to feel patriotic and feel we are doing something for our servicemen,’ he said. ‘If we owned a Dairy Queen we would be giving away free ice cream, but… we own the sex capital of the world. What better way is there to give back?’” — Yahoo (US)

Sex has probably always been more of a motivation to join the military than patriotism or reimbursement for college tuition. Modern guidelines for the conduct of war prohibit soldiers from raping their enemies, but that doesn’t stop recruiters from insinuating to prospective soldiers about the tremendous sexual leverage of the American dollar in poverty-stricken exotic locales. “Be all that you can be,” they trumpet. “And get blowjobs for a dollar,” they add, winking.

Or perhaps they should also add: “Get cunnilingus for a buck.” The military is no longer the exclusive preserve of men, and the most interesting point about this story is that the brothel is offering free sex to both genders. As of press time, thirteen men and three women had come to claim their wartime spoils. Unfortunately, the article does not state whether the brothel offers men or women or both to the returning soldiers. Either way, this must no doubt be the feel-good story of the year — literally. After all, if you were a returning soldier, which would you prefer: to be welcomed home with open arms? Or with open legs?

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